Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving & Turkey Poem

This little poem was too cute not to share.  I hope you and your family have a blessed Thanksgiving!

                When I was a young turkey,
                new to the coop,
                My big brother Tom
                took me out on the stoop,
                Then he sat me down,
                and he spoke real slow,
                And he told me there was
                something that I just had to know.

                His look and his tone
                I will always remember,
                When he told me of the horrors
                of, well...... Black November!
                Come about August,
                now listen to me,
                Each day you'll get six meals
                instead of your three.
                And soon you'll be thick,
                where once you were thin,
                and you'll grow a big rubbery
                thing under your chin;
                And then one morning,
                when you're warm in your bed,
                In comes the farmer's wife,
                to hack off your head;
                Then she'll pluck out all your
                feathers until you're bald 'n pink,
                And scoop out your insides
                and leave you in the sink;
                And then comes the worst part
                he said not bluffing,
                She'll spread your hind quarters
                and pack your bottom with stuffing!

                Well, the rest of his words
                were too grim to repeat,
                I sat on the stoop like a
                winged piece of meat,
                And decided on the spot
                that to avoid being cooked,
                I'd have to lay low to
                remain overlooked.
                I began a new diet of
                nuts and granola,
                High-roughage salads,
                juice and diet cola;
                And as they ate pastries,
                chocolates and crepes,
                I stayed in my room
                doing Jane Fonda tapes.
                I maintained my weight
                of two pounds and a half,
                And tried not to notice when
                the bigger birds laughed;
                But it was I who was
                laughing, under my breath,
                As they chomped and they
                chewed, ever closer to death.
                And sure enough when
                Black November rolled around,
                I was the last turkey left in
                the Turkey compound;
                So now I'm a pet in the
                farmer's wife's lap;
                I haven't a worry,
                so I eat and I nap.
                She held me today,
                while sewing and humming,
                And smiled at me and said
                "Christmas is coming."


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